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Townhall...
Putting Children First
By Linda Chavez
6/3/2011
For the first time in history, less than half of Americans now live in
married-couple households. The new finding by the Census Bureau
reflects the most profound change in the nature of American society
ever to have occurred, yet practically no one talks about it. Only 48
percent of American households are made up of married couples. These
numbers reflect a sea change in living arrangements. In 1950, married
couples were 78 percent of all households.
Some of these figures reflect our aging population: We have more widows
and widowers than at any time in the past. But they also reflect
changing mores. People are marrying at older ages, and larger numbers
are choosing not to marry at all, not to stay married, and to have
children outside of marriage. A new Gallup poll shows that more people
now approve of both out-of-wedlock births and divorce. Only 41 percent
of Americans believe it is morally wrong to bear a child outside
marriage, and a mere 23 percent think divorce is morally wrong.
What all this means is that increasing numbers of children are growing
up without two parents, and few policymakers seem to care, even though
the societal consequences bode ill for the future. Myriad studies have
documented that children who grow up without two parents are more
likely to do worse in school, drop out, commit crimes, and earn less
during their lifetimes than those who are raised with both parents,
even adjusting for economic status and race. They are also far less
likely to have stable relationships and marriages as adults, thus
fueling the cycle of marriage breakdown.
Perhaps the most alarming result of this family breakdown comes from a
new analysis of longitudinal data from a large cohort of young children
-- primarily bright, white children born to middle-class and affluent
parents -- who were followed throughout their lives. The study found
that even relatively privileged children suffered when their parents
divorced. According to researchers Howard Friedman and Leslie Martin,
the children of divorce had an average lifespan five years shorter than
those whose parents stayed married.
And children of divorce aren’t as bad off as children whose parents
never married, who now make up the vast majority of African-American
children, and a growing number of Hispanic and working-class white
children.
So what are policymakers doing about the problem? Not much. Indeed, the
rare discussions that take place on public policy toward marriage focus
on whether gay couples should be allowed to marry. But that’s hardly
the biggest issue. However individuals feel about gay marriage, the
real threat to the institution of marriage is one posed by the decline
in the institution among heterosexuals.
There isn’t much government can do to encourage people to marry; but
for the last 40 years, government has been heavily implicated in
encouraging divorce. All states now have no-fault divorce laws, which
make it easier to dissolve a marriage contract than a cellphone
contract. One thing policymakers could do is revisit the ease with
which we allow couples -- especially those with minor children -- to
dissolve their marriages.
A new group, the Coalition for Divorce Reform, is trying to do just
that. Chris Gersten, a former Bush administration official and my
husband of 44 years, started the organization -- and he is joined by
many of the leading marriage and divorce experts in the country. They
are working together to promote legislation that will require divorcing
couples to take research-based skills-training programs, which have
been shown to reduce divorce. The aim is to help those couples in
low-conflict marriages if they have minor children and neither partner
has engaged in physical abuse or is addicted to drugs or alcohol. More
information can be found online at www.divorcereform.info.
This effort may not rescue the institution of marriage from the peril
it’s in, but it’s a start. New research tells us that 30 percent of
divorcing couples say they would be willing to reconcile if there were
low-cost approaches to saving their marriages available.
In the end, it’s the children who pay for the devastating effects of
divorce. It’s time we start putting our kids first.
Read it at Townhall
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