|
|
The
views expressed
on this page are soley those of the author and do not
necessarily
represent the views of County News Online
|
|
The
Other Side of the Edge….
Live Each Moment
By Joe Facinoli
He is 92, she is 88.
Until five years ago, he was married to the wonderful woman who had
been his bride, for sixty one years.
Until six years ago, she was the very happy wife of the charming man
she had married, fifty nine years before.
Both the wonderful woman and the charming man have passed on
now.
Until three years ago, the survivors of these long, well lived lives,
had not met.
Until two years ago, both thought that they would never again know the
simple pleasures and joy, ….and love, which had blessed them each, for
the previous six decades.
Until they moved into the same seniors community, they had only
memories, and the clear image, and prospect, of being alone for the
rest of their days.
And then it happened. The Magic again, ….for
each. The impossible. The "how could
lightning strike twice in the same lifetime" experience, that meant
everything, and a new beginning, for both of these good souls.
Until three weeks ago, he rode his bicycle 5 miles a day.
Until a year ago, he ran 3 miles a day. Until two years
ago, he water skied with his grandsons, in the Gulf of Mexico every
January, and he wasn't even the one driving the boat!
And each and every day, during the past two years, he expressed his
love to her, in every way he could think of.
Until two months ago, she painted at her easel every day, or carved
chunks of wood into pieces of art, and created all manner of other
artistry, while never missing a chance to light up anyone who might
dare disagree politically with her, and her boys (uh, ….that would
be........Glenn Beck and Bill O'Reilly).
And each and every day, for the past two years, she enjoyed all of his
flirtatious advances (although denying it, at least at first, as any
proper lady should), while giving back more than enough emotion and
affection to keep him hooked (and she loved it all).
They came to adore each other, and spent almost all of their days
together, doing any number of frivolous, silly, loving, ….and fun
things, any thing, that came to mind. They would regularly
fly his kite, and the old fashioned way too, by dragging it along the
ground while he ran fast enough, and long enough, to get the damn thing
airborne!
He would also help "little old ladies", and any others in need, with
the carrying of their groceries, and such, while she admonished him
(later) for being such an incurable flirt. But she loved
the fact that she was the one (and only) whom he came home to, after
his many "good deeds".
They shared much of each day together, including the grooming and
working of her many flower beds and gardens (even in winter), and those
of his balcony and inside gardens, along with anyone else's who needed
it, whether those folks knew it, or not (or even asked).
They both still drove their cars too, for a while (and way too long,
for their concerned and aggregate friends and families), but finally
agreed to give them up, ....together.
This was storybook stuff, and very sweet, for any age. Happiness
abounded, and they both held on, knowing the clock was against them,
but also knowing that every moment left was precious, and they were
going to miss exactly none of them.
We should all be so lucky. And loved.
Two months ago, she suddenly felt very weak, and quite fatigued.
Her doctor recommended a hospital visit, where they discovered her
blood pressure to be extremely low, and her heart to have a dangerous
arrhythmic pattern. Not so good.
He worried and worried, but could do nothing, lacking transportation,
and all of this being out of his control
anyway.
Three weeks ago, he caught the flu, developed pneumonia, and was taken
to the same hospital, where he was given a blood thinner (thought to be
a helpful thing), which reacted with a previous heart condition, sent
him into a coma, and onto full life support. Not good ….at
all.
She, slowly got better, and after a tricky de-fib procedure, some close
monitoring, and some meds, was allowed to come home. But
only wanted to be with him. Thinking that seeing him in that
condition might only make her situation worse, the doctors said
no. So she went about her daily business, as best she could,
missing him, until she made a wrong step, fell, and broke her
hip. Not so good….again.
He, was still in his life supported coma, while just down the hall, she
lay waiting for surgery on her 88 year old hip. This can be a
good thing, but at 88, not always.
But the surgeons did their thing anyway, and well. The
joint was stabilized, her blood pressure held up, the heart was strong,
and four days later she was in the rehab center at their home
community. Tough old gal.
Not to be outdone, he beat the 90% odds against, woke up a few days
later, got off the support machines, and, while not quite able to do
cartwheels just yet, tossed off the worst effects of the flu and
pneumonia, although the blood thinner problem will have lasting effects
on his kidneys. Rehab was now in order for him, as
well.
Of course, now you know where this is heading.
Both have 8 to 10 week rehabilitation stints ahead of them, to recover
from their assorted maladies, and are the only people you will ever
meet who absolutely love, love, love being in rehab!
In fact, they could not be happier about it, 'cause guess who’s got
adjoining rooms at the community rehab/health center?? I
mean, it could be the Ritz Carlton, and it wouldn't be any better for
them, ...just sayin'!!
She's doing a little better than he is, although neither gets around
all that well. But it doesn't matter. The way
they're looking at it, this is the third, and most probably (or
improbably) the very last go round for these happy
two.
Big smiles, holding hands, and just being together. They
know how lucky they are, still here, still on the “right side of the
turf”, still having someone to love, and to share these precious
moments with, ever more quickly dwindling now.
Live every moment. There’s only so many marbles in the
jar. Take nothing for granted, and don't miss
anything. The price is too high, if you
do.
Love, and appreciate, ....openly and generously. Live life
for the simple things,….and care deeply. Somehow, it always
comes back to you.
And don’t be afraid to fall in love, it’s the only thing in life that
really matters.
This "forever young" couple shows us how, and will, every day they have
left.
Joe Facinoli
(Btw, that's my Mom, and her new "lifelong" friend, we’re talkin’
about.)
(You can reach Joe at joefacinoli@gmail.com)
|
|
|
|
