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A Messy
Revolution
By Kate Burch
Now that we have seen the spectacle of disgraced former Congressman
Anthony Weiner relapsing into his addiction to the sexual perversion of
exhibitionism, thereby totally destroying his marriage and his career,
and possibly seriously traumatizing his young son, it is high time that
we honestly assess and seriously work to turn back the damage done to
our people by the reign of the terribles that was birthed by the
“sexual revolution.”
Factors underlying the profound changes we have seen in sexual mores
are many, but probably the linchpin was the development of reliable
contraceptive methods, unlinking sexual relations from reproduction and
family creation. Many of us were frightened by specious warnings
about “overpopulation” into thinking that limiting family size was a
dire necessity. But, those who celebrated the prospect of sex
without responsibility and without guilt have caused degradation and
erosion of our culture. Boys and men are devalued and girls and
women are objectified. Women are allowed, and even encouraged, to
kill their unborn children. Marriage is denigrated, distorted,
and trivialized. Societal messages are contradictory and
confusing. On the one hand, young women are taught that college
campuses are infused with a “rape culture,” and on the other hand they
face threat of social marginalization if they do not participate in
“hooking up.” Apparel for girls, even young girls, is inappropriately
revealing and seductive. When my daughter’s girls were
young, she appreciated my sewing most of their clothes because it was
difficult to find modest but attractive clothing at the mall.
Pornography has always been with us, and if only sexually explicit
materials intended to cause or enhance sexual arousal were involved,
and if former attitudes that kept pornography out of the family room
and the department stores, and kept it “under the counter” in book
stores and, figuratively, on the internet were still in place, it might
not be a huge problem. If porn is generally viewed as
sleazy and as at best a vice, public opprobrium and shaming tends to
keep it in line.
However, today it is difficult to escape being constantly assaulted by
sexual images. Additionally, these pornographic images are very
often shockingly exploitive, portraying acts of degradation,
punishment, and violence as sex. Popular literature portrays men
as abusive and controlling, and usually also powerful and rich; women
are sexually naïve and ready to do or accept anything the man wants,
even infliction of pain or bodily damage, to please a man and be
sexy. How does this square with the campaign for equal rights for
women? Girls and women are persuaded that to be desirable they
must be “pornified,” and that seductive attire is necessary to
demonstrate that they are comfortable with their bodies.
There is growing evidence that pornography is addicting, and some argue
that it should be treated as a public health concern. There are
documented changes in the brain associated with frequent and compulsive
viewing of pornographic images. There is evidence that affected
people have at least as much difficulty quitting an addiction to porn
as addictions to marijuana, and almost as much difficulty getting freed
from porn as from heroin. There is now a recognized urologic
disorder, porn-induced erectile dysfunction, or PIED, affecting
significant numbers of men. Leonard Sax, in his book, “Boys
Adrift,” writes of the growing numbers of young men who are not
interested in dating real women, but rather use internet porn as their
preferred sexual outlet. There is also evidence that men’s
perception of women becomes more negative with consumption of
pornography.
Healthy sexuality involves engaging with another real person in an
ongoing, committed, loving, and fruitful relationship.
Preoccupation with forms of sexual “gratification” that are purely
focused on momentary pleasure; that are exploitive, endanger children,
and encourage oppression of women; that interfere with normal sexual
response and performance in men; and that bring about loneliness,
alienation, corruption, and unhappiness must be
discouraged. People must be educated about the dangers of
pornography and other perverted notions stemming from the sexual
revolution. It is up to those of us who believe in the value of
life and life-affirming relationships to appeal to the self-interest of
others by living our lives in ways that clearly demonstrate the
enduring rewards of committed relationship.
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