By Lois E. Wilson
Not all four-letter words are bad and require being banned and removed from society’s discourse. “Need” and “want” are four-letter words difficult to ignore. When we are born, it is hoped we have loving parents to take care of us and our needs. It that case “need” is defined as something essential to our life and well-being—a necessity. “Want” is a desire to have or do something.
Young children push away the spoonful of food that the parent is offering. Children may pull the hand closer and perhaps utter “More!” The child is beginning to let wants be known and indicates preferences with a smile or cry of “No!”
Later children begin to like and want to play interactive games such as Peek-a-Boo. They prefer certain toys and enjoy it when books are read to them. As we mature and begin to fill more needs for ourselves, the more “wants” we develop.
The competition between the two continues throughout our lives. We are constantly weighing them in an attempt to balance them on our internal scale.
James Russell Lowell observed, “Want gave tongue, and at her howl—Sin awakened with a growl.” He is warning that our choices can backfire. For example, a teenager who wants to belong with a certain group tests the effect of drugs. His “want” becomes an addictive “need.”
Want can also make people choose between wants such as: education, career goals, buying a car or home. They must weigh on their internal scale the importance and impact of each to their lives and budgets. The scale is also a reminder to not turn needs into absolute necessities.
However, one should recognize the old proverb, “Necessity is the mother of invention.” Plato put it this way, “Our need will be the real creator.” Vauvenargues stated, “Necessity relieves us from the embarrassment of choice.”
Two other important four-letter words are “work” and “play.” Hard work can put one well on the way to educational goals, successful careers, and to helping achieve needs and wants. Play and recreation can refresh our energy.
About the four-letter words “gain” and “loss” Bertrand Russell wrote: ”To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness.”
We should try as the Bible says—to alleviate need where we see it; that is God’s hand guiding us. It can be the determiner whether our lives balance out to a “loss” or “gain.” We pray He will evaluate our lives as a “gain.”